soon enough, the exam has past two third, I didn't do well. Especially maths, how do I made so many stupid mistakes remains a mystery to myself, was i invaded by some kind of devil? Sure it is. This time the mark gonna be terribly horrible, it's not my standard at all, but is the standard of my mental spirit, too weak to go through tough time. other subjects also not very confident.Even liberal art subjects, because there's always someone who are much better than me.I was definitely mad and being moody, but what am I gonna do to change all this? Yes, heaven is finally where we belong ,and all the things on the ground will make you regret that you've spend so much energy on it as soon as you enter the paradise, where has only peace and happiness. But I'm not that far yet and I'm still a normal god-creature after all, I have all the shortcomings that other people have. And there's still so many years to go on the ground. So I really really couldn't fully comfortable to hand in my load to god. But life only gets hopeful when god's around.Dante said he felt that I had been alienated by some of the classmates, especially girls.(But I don't really care about that cause I don't really want to have anything to do with girls, they're trouble they're mess, in other hands none of them are up to my standard :))The reason why I was alienated was because I always be with him he presumed. I guess so but who cares man? I know the principle I know the rule ,simple and easy.Watch a lot of , envying their life style, we are all high school students, but take a look at their life: playing, girls, sports practising ,surfing,even goofing around. And look at the accomdation they lived in: what the hell! So luxurious and amazing. and look at poor Chinese high school students, totally live in hopelessness and bore, don't know how to socialise at all. Is that human ?I just wanted to ask.After school go and make passport, what the hell told I couldn't make there cause I wasn't the relative of public security worker, newmind, this is socialism and this is China, who want to give a damn to your suck passport! Vanished! Vanished! Vanished!The country lose its meaning of survive.It brings no good but harm to the world, to god's holy land.

That's all, can I just walk away ?