There's always a fantasy world deep inside everyone's heart, or a ownself universe, where their date, their prince charming, there dreams lies. I guess I've lost the most original pure affection, I has been isolated in this wicked world. I affirm I'm a trash if I keep on earning my living in such sinful, disgusting atmosphere. No one could ever survive. Cause what's the main different between human beings and animals? Conscience. And personally I will add religion. An indivudual without conscience or religion then what the hell character he or she is? What am I saying? Maybe just venting my anger. Alright, but what am I angrying for? I'm not foolish and I am not totally being deceived. It's just due to present situation I have to make some sacrifices and temporarily lose my conscience, as long as it is not causing serious consequences then it's OK to me. Make several great friends, a really true friend, which I have already found, what more could I ask for in the following 2 years? I suppose no and thanks god a lot. When do I become so extreme to wrote such a freaky composition?Today I saw a introduction reference about Singapore. I found Singapore a good place for consuming your money. It really costs a huge amount of money to enjoy the high class entertainment or relaxation. It amazed me but doesn't mean I didn't want to take it. Singapore means a lot to me, my best friend, my initiative aboard life, anyway it just means a lot. I will definitely go back more than once to see my native pals there. Which means I will definitely travel to there, but not now, maybe when I'm wealthy enough. Grab my family with me spend a whole month there or whatsoever. oh American chick, how sweet! But that's just saying.I'm going to take IEITS soon, it may not be that horrible as it seems to be. I'm not sure I'll perform but I won't be that worse I assume.Enthusiastically finished a impromptu essay. I felt quite released after this. So long didn't express my true feeling in English, it's like a swagman finally went back to where he belonged.WICKED WORLD. SICK, TIRING, UNREAL, PRETENDING,MEANINGLESS,HOPELESS,UNREASONABLE.I felt simple-minded means happiness sometimes.

After momerising so many SAT vocabulary I sighed: English could be that difficult! So many unknown words, and I knew I'm still going to fully master them. I was satisfied and proud of myself.
This morning, first time try worship at home along with my parents. Really much better. Our worship was short and efficient. We finished our worship within an hour. We have also done a lot of things. Such as singing praise, read the Bible skillfully, we did many discussion and used 2-languages to read. And even self-test. So we have remembered the verses firmly. And we have also improven our English skills unconsciously. This was much better than the church's very long and endless singing and singing. To be honest, I really gained more at home than in church. I think if church still haven't thought of making any progress, more and more worshippers will join us. We worship on our own way.
And I can see a big change, postitive change on my parents relationship. They seem to go back to their puppylove time. I was happy and gratified. That's the way they should have been. I hope such relation will last long. And I believe, with god's unmeasured love, Yes they can.
This afternoon, played soccer with 陈允 along with his father and friend, as well as my father. I always grouped with 2 little guys. So we were losing all the time. No exception. And I found my ability to control the ball, SUCK! Too ashamed to mention that.When I was 2 little boys opponent I couldn't even go through them. Although there was shining spot, but it was just a moment of acuity. I really fell back so much comparing to professional players. I could never become them. NEVER.
Today, dad created me such a good english envirnoment. Once he switch on the TV,it's english channel and english programs. That's huge.Under such atmosphere, we can all become fluent english speaker!

Obama is going to be president of US soon. See what progress and what change will he make! I am curious!

I have been back for more than 2 months. How's my present life? 2 words: messy and moody. Firstly, I am required to stay at home and study all the day. Sincerely I haven't gone through a single energetic day yet. Everyday I am part-time low-spirited, and part-time slacking. Of course I know 2nd semester as well as the entrance exam are in hand. But I just can't cheer up. Is that because too many constrain? Probably yes. How am I going to deal with so many disturbing messy things? I am freaked out.
Another one is the setback in my english. A summary and some pre-practices can cost me 2 hours! What's that about?
Spring festival I'm not going anywhere but staying in Guangzhou. How cruel will that be? Is that the reason why am I going down? Absolutely yes.
1 of the most famous teleplay by FOX CO.LTD <24> has come back. I watched the first 2 episodes. It's splendid! I must catch on with that.
Recently everynight dreamt of my former-classmates, no matter S'pore's or my junior school or ...,just can't stop dreaming. How suspicious was that? What does that mean?

Life, should be like that.

I met up with mum before 2009 came.Such an amazing year has past.
2008,China have met so many troubles and I,also have experienced many different styles of life.I studied in Singapore government school and made so many friends;Act as a volunteer in Sichuan Disaster Area;A short-team stay in Huangshan!Also made friends with many people,what a terrific year!
Left Huangshan,a little bit craving for lingering and a little bit disappointment.Am I too shy to express a different view?Otherwise I would leave Huangshan with no regret.But "what's done cannot be undone."So from opposite side,It may not be a bad thing if there's regret left.It is for this reason that I still want to visit Huangshan when I grow up.Anyway,byebye Huangshan.
I did insisted 2 activities for quite a few days.First 1 was doing push-up everyday,it did last for half a month;Second thing was I kept on momerising SAT vocubulary eveyday,about 14 words a day.And I remembered them with ease but of course need to revise everyday.I have to catch on my english learning.
2 months almost non-english life quite tortured me.And I can felt an obivious setback in my english standard.And I am still harassed by my nonproficiency in english writing.But what can I do about this anyway?Practice and practice...
Dad will also be back this afternoon,at that time our family will reunited.Excellent!I wish in the new year:
1 I could drive a holy life,truly
2 A round of US trip
3 Commendable China High School Life,still making many friends
4 fluent in English!

Oh ya right
A late regards to all my friend!
Happy "牛" Year!

My Worries
Recently I was busy looking for a High school to settle down and start my study as soon as possible.
Mum and I was dreaming of Affiliated High School of SCNU,which is almost a impossible option.We also submitted my application and some supporting documents but there is no feedback so far.Vice principal said leaders need a conference to make the final decision.But I didn’t put much expectation on it,even though I enthusiastically want to make it.
And applying this school recall some of my bad memories:I used to have a very good and close friend,we chatted together training sport together even help each others study.And now I still got his piece in my souvenir album.After graduation,we were still friends for a short time.But after 2 months vacation,he became another guy.Which I didn’t recognize:he didn’t reply my regard message;When I went back to my former school to attend “Art Festival”,I saw his again,I believe he saw me as well,but there was no reaction from him,and his indifferent glimpse broke my heart:what matter can totally ruined a section of such beautiful friendship?I sighed why friendship can be such unreliable?Maybe that’s not even a real friendship?But I treasure what we have had,because at least that was still a sweet memory.
Maybe that was exactly a misunderstanding,we just need to talk and declare the problems.If that’s true I will absolutely forgive him.I treasured every friendship I have ever had,I hope all of that are everlasting.
He is also in Affiliated high now.If I get into Affiliated high,there is a high chance that I will meet him,I hope at that moment,we are still friends.
And I recall some of my former schoolmates now in Affiliated high,some of them are not qualified from my view.But that’s fate,there is no absolute fair in this world.Maybe they are really not qualified,but they reach the lowest standard,I didn’t,so I don’t think I’m qualified to discuss about them also.I don’t feel well about those people,but what can I do to change all this?Make myself better.Because for the time being,I am facing an much more unfavorable situation than they do.So take care of myself first.
If I fail this application,I’ve got no much more choices left already.Either GuangYa High School or Affiliated High school Of Guangzhou University(This is also a affiliated high school but unlike the prior 1.A different of paradise and hell.)What school am I going to is not the most concern to me.Get into what school is not a big deal.But 2 factors really disturbing me:The time I spend on transportation and what kind of people am I get along with?What kind of people am I going to face everyday.That what I concern about.If the distance between school and home is too far then I can barely get enough sleep.What kind of teacher,what kind of coursebook,even what kind of course,I also don’t care that much.But classmates are different,they are the people I will spend most time with everyday.They are the people I need to talk with and share my feelings with.If they don’t have a good personalities,what am I going to deal with all this?Bad classmates is definitely unacceptable to me.
Get into Affiliated High is absolutely the best choice for me,see if god put his mercy on me.Even a big sum of money required I also not grudge.
Mentioning about god,I really feel ashamed after I read an essay about the Nordic races that settled in US.They only loyal to their religion、their god.They keep away from all the different kinds of temptations in this world.They refused to use electricity、refused to use car、machines、refused to be called up for military service、refused to serve jury.(Because they believe only god has the right to judge the justice.I agree this,but their opinions are too extreme:there are so many affairs in this world,big or small.Sometimes god really needs to use human’s hand to handle the small cases.Think about it?What will the world be if we need god to judge everything for us?I guess that why god created jury,god created everything for a reason.
But I believe the Nordic Americans,their foundation of their religions are definitely much more stable or than our modern people.I believe god doesn’t expect us to give up everything we have now,but we really need to spend more time for god.Honor god is the only reason why we are here,in this earth.
I also need to have a completely self-criticism:what I have done to repay god?None!A big big neo!Take some time from playing desktop、from watching TV or even reading books.Reading books seem to be a very solid reason to keep away from god.Without god,although I got so many knowledges,what for?Nothing.
When will I have an entirely change?I’m yearning.Or I really need someone to talk with.
Today I read a passage introduced a billionaire,also Chelsea FC’s boss:Arburamovic.(This is a wrong spelling but it doesn’t matter.)His properties and riches.Such as:How many yachtes he had;How many vehicles he owned;How many aeroplanes he drive.I really think that is too extravagant.He still got a Russian beautiful model girlfriend,of course I believe their affection is not base on real love but his money.
What I want?Let me make a list of them:(Sequence is randomly)
1、A luxurious condo.(A big section for my parents.)
2、A wild SUV
3、A satisfactory family,2 lovely sons and 2 cute daughters,as well as A sweet wife.
4、A constant offer for god.
5、Travel all over the world with my family.

That’s only the wish on my personal life.I will have another list on my career target.
Wow!That’s quite a long essay for me!Maybe it’s not a big deal to those English user,but it meant a lot for me!What a big challenges!I believe that how I improve!

How to say?It's a little bit boring I guess.
First,Watching US TV Play series is not as convenient as in Singapore
Internet speed is slow,download an episode is much slower,it take me as 4 times as in Singapore to download 1 episode.
But no more complain,home is home,sweet home,there is nowhere in this universal like home!
And 4 friends who are supposed to visit me in Dec,please noticed,my plan,or more specifically,my time table got a huge change,I got to go to school during that period of time,and the school is in other province,so maybe you guys don't have much time in Guangzhou,maybe you all got to move to a much colder place.Remember to get mentally prepared!
These 2 days,I was trying to study the knowledge in my China Textbook,such as Physical、Biology by my own.But I failed,I couldn't concentrate,due to my little sister I think?Or my strange habit,which is I sleep a lot at home,sleeping insects were around me through out the whole day.When I was on something,even a very little distraction would led me to sleeping,or a nap,and for quite long time.Maybe I slept too little in Singapore?Probably yes
And my dad seem to be in bad mood,I didn't know why and he was not willing to tell me.But his mood really stress me out so I had to ask,and then I knew he got sick while volunteering.I felt so sorry,the only thing I can do is to perform better and make him more comfortable,this shouldn't be that difficult.
Still got a lot of friend to meet,and my physique need to catch on,I am still the charming man,that's not going to change.Maybe I should change my name to attraction?

Recent wish:get much closer to god than ever,which is really the most important subject in my life,I ought to intrust him.
Make into a excellent high school,cause get to know more high quality people is essential to my success.
My Guqin,I really need to catch on,see how am I going to overcome my laziness.